next to the toffee tree

well, its been a while friends. maybe i shouldn’t call you that cuz you don’t know what i’m doing most of the time.

 i just thought i should write not out of inspiration but more out of obligation. but sometimes you go for a run out of obligation and by the end its the most inspiring. well if you can imagine i’m here at university i haven’t shaved in a while and its started to look, lets say, not so good. its because i’m now in a very funny situation where i have to pay for everything. its not the same as when if you needed something you would just have to go to the old city – there is not old city in edmonton which is quite disappointing. i am working on a really good bag of kenyan dark roast coffee which i feel sticking to my tongue and cheeks, i guess that’s why your supposed to make coffee out of it instead of just eating the grounds.

my brother and his friends have taken to calling me green nose. it is a pretty accurate description of me, young, naive and in an environment unlike most i have graced. but i’m coming to grips with more and more is that i am a foreigner wherever i go, with my eyes lifted toward the horizon of an unearthly land. and sometimes i feel so irrelevant to the people i talk to, like i can’t actually empathize with their lives cuz i’ve never come close to living a life anything like theirs and i’m just this fool bumbling over words in a language i don’t speak. my heart is pretty heavy for people lately, i havn’t felt that for a while. it comes with my renewed hunger for God i’m sure, a strong hunger right in my core. which excites a familiar passion that i havn’t felt in a while. and thus the seasons change.

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 so here i am, a green nose in a world of where they can convince you worth is measured on a 4.0 scale, with my face lifted in anticipation to a sunrise in a far off land where we’ll know.